BOLI Blog

How my wedding changed my life

Other things change besides your name.

Wedding planning is an emotional roller coaster for many. Others may feel cool as a cucumber, loving every minute of it. But once the wedding is over – it can leave you with a mix of emotions. Besides the obvious change after your wedding (that ring on your finger and the Mrs. in front of your name), some weddings can change your life in more ways than one. Here are just a few ways my wedding changed my life.

I now consider myself an expert in all things wedding. I find myself giving advice to any (and all) of my friends who get engaged. This is obviously not the case, because some might even consider my wedding to be on the toned down side – no trolley cars, cigar rollers, big bands, doughnut walls, etc. But I always find myself trolling the BOLI Facebook page or the Flowerfield Brides page to offer up my two cents in the hope that others will learn from my experiences – either good or bad. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that I still hear to this day that our wedding was the best wedding people attended!

While others may feel relief after the stressful wedding planning process, I actually found myself with nothing to do! I immediately started looking for something else to plan! Luckily for me, my stepdaughter was turning 16 the next year, so I jumped into planning her Sweet 16 – which is basically a wedding. That itch was now scratched as I eagerly called vendors, looked up showcases and visited venues.

When you put together my feeling of ‘emptiness’ and my newfound ‘wedding expertise,’ I find myself thinking often of quitting my job for event planning. Now, the jury is still out on whether this actually happens, but I don’t even think I’d be having these thoughts if I hadn’t have gotten married.

But in all seriousness, another big way my wedding changed my life is that I learned to be less selfish. Let me be clear – I’m not a selfish person by any means, but I lived on my own for almost 10 years before I met my now-husband. I am very independent, so it took me a while to realize that I can lean on him and need to consider someone else beside myself when making decisions. For me personally, I not only consider my husband now, but also my stepchildren. This is something I’m still getting used to – I mean, who wants to share their good chocolate with a house full of people!

It’s definitely amazing to be with someone who always has my back no matter what – even when I’m being a pain in the ass. And that is a huge change that, again, I’m still getting used to!

As much as things change when you get married, though, I find when people ask me ‘how’s married life?’, that I often answer with ‘The same – except now I can’t get rid of him!’ I’m joking, of course. But the reality is – if your relationship is strong and you find your person – the biggest change after your wedding should just be your last name!